Don’t Let Me Forget to Tell You About…

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Don’t Let Me Forget to Tell You About…

Posted on 04 December 2006 by Judie Stanford

Things have been absolutely crazy here at my house for the last couple of months. Between the excitement (and crazy hours)�of starting Gear Diary and�keeping up with contacts I’ve made over the years, I have also been doing two other things that are very near and dear to my heart – running my family’s ranch and being the co-Advisory Board Chairman for the Zeta Kappa Chapter of Sigma Kappa at Angelo State University.

I feel like veering wildly off topic and going into personal territory today, so if you came for gadget stuff – skip this entry and go on to the next.

But if you would like to get to know me better, then read on. The ranch will be a topic for another time, because today I am going to tell you a little bit about my experience with Sigma Kappa…

gear_diary_sigma_kappa_02
yep – that’s me on the right…wearing gargoyles!

I was a Pike (Pi Kappa Alpha fraternity) little sister during the fall semester of 1985, and while that was fun and flattering for a while -�I soon tired of being eye candy at�rush parties. I wanted�to find a group of like-minded people who would enhance my college life, and so I started looking at other student organizations. This was the height of the mid 1980′s sorority “bow-head” era, and I was convinced that there was no place for me in that Stepford-Wives breeding ground.�

But I still managed to keep an open mind when I was�invited to�a Sigma Kappa spring 1986 rush party. During an evening when I kept expecting to meet girls named “Muffy” or “Buffy” who had boyfriends named “Biff” and “Bud”, I instead met girls that cared about much more than just getting their MRS degree; what a pleasant surprise.

I�had always been the type of girl that mainly had guy friends because I thought I related to them�better; many of the girls I knew casually were “stupid”;�these girls were anything but. They were goal-oriented, personable, friendly,�and none of them treated me like a freak because I was more interested in car stereo components and sports cars than I was in designer bags (that interest would come later, believe me).

I was initiated that semester, and I went on to have some of the best times and some of the worst times of my life with those girls over the next few years.�I did things I would otherwise have never tried, and I met people I would have otherwise never known. As a result, I�have made life-long friends that I wouldn’t trade for the world.

I always was the tallest one in the group

When I was a collegiate, I admired and looked up to my chapter advisor, Debra Brown. She could put “the fear of God” into�me with a certain look, and�winning her approval was a major thing. She was always willing to listen when�I needed a friend, and she was also the first one to tell�me when I was “messing up”.�I could trust her judgement,�as she was one of the few “older” women I knew that I could talk to about anything. I realize now that she wasn’t that much older than me at the time – but the fact that she had already graduated, was married and had a young son made her seem so much more worldly.

In 1999 I was asked to come back and support the Zeta Kappa chapter as an advisor. I was more than happy to do it; it only seemed right that I give back to a group of girls that had had such a huge influence on my young adulthood.

So now my role�as an advisor is to help these young women make�their own smart choices that will enhance their college years and strengthen their growth into responsible and successful adults. I don’t tell them what to do, I can only advise them…big difference.

Sometimes they actually listen, and sometimes they don’t. Ah well,�I was the same way.

No matter how aggravating it can sometimes be, and no matter that sometimes I�want to just “quit” to enjoy more ME time,�I can honestly say that one of the greatest joys of my adult life has been being a part of these young womens’ college experience.

However, it�blows my mind that many of the girls I am advising now were not even born when I joined… Sheesh.

This post was written by:

Judie Stanford - who has written 1699 posts on Gear Diary.

I started Gear Diary on September 30, 2006, and my goal was that this not be an easily labeled site. We all have gear that we use daily – some of it electronic and some of it organic. I think it is fascinating to explore the equipment that makes our lives easier, more entertaining, more productive, and more manageable. My hope is that Gear Diary visitors will find this site to be a comfortable and friendly place to discuss interesting topics – and not only those that are tech related, as well as a location to discover various types of gear – whatever that term may end up implying – that they never knew existed. My specialty is in-depth reviews written in a layman’s terms, because everyone can understand technology, sometimes it just takes a little translating. +Judie Stanford

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greypoet
these girls were anything but.They were goal-oriented, personable, friendly, and none of them treated me like a freak because I was more interested in car stereo components and sports cars than I was in designer bags
As a guy, I have the same feeling about other guys that believe conquests, drinking and dope are the sole conversational topics. It’s difficult to find “normal” conversation but, as you discovered, worth the search.
Good for you for continuing the track as an advisor.
jim
http://www.geardiary.com Judie
Thank you!
mcsouth
Judie: You’ll have to forgive me if this is something that “everyone knows”, but sororities/fraternities were not a big thing in the Canadian college system, where I went to school.
How exactly do you act as an adviser? Do you simply make yourself available over the phone or email, or do you actually travel to sorority house on occasion to “check in”? I guess I kind of assumed that since you were ranching (I come from a farm background myself, and still work in agricultural industry), that you probably weren’t living in a college town.
For that matter, do they still do “frat” and sorority houses at most colleges, or has that pretty much gone by the wayside? It seems to me that there seemed to be a lot of “negative press” a few years back regarding several frat and sorority houses at some big colleges that were being shut down for a variety of reasons. Again, forgive my ignorance, as my only experience with frats and sororities is through the movies – and I kind of doubt that Animal House and its ilk are a true indication of what they are really like!
http://www.geardiary.com Judie
mcsouth, I am glad you asked those questions – many fraternities and sororities get a terrible reputation based on the actions of a noisy few. Obviously there are times when the bad press is warranted, but I think that when it happens the good groups get tarred by the same brush – and that is unfair.
Without getting too technical, I’ll just say that there are “National Sororities” and “local sororities”. National Sororities (like Sigma Kappa) are govered by the National Panhellenic Conference�(NPC). They all have similar policies on underage drinking, hazing, risky behavior, and the other stereotypical behavior that we’ve all seen in the movies. In other words – it is not acceptable. NPC sororities believe in treating members with dignity and respect, and they foster an environment where the members can grow accademically and socially.
I live in San Angelo, which although it has very rural edges, is a city of approximately 100,000. Angelo State University has somewhere in the neighborhood of 6,000 students, and there is also a local junior college – so it is definitely a “college town”. ASU does not have sorority houses, which is nice – less headaches that way.
Advisors have certain collegiate officers that they assist in their positions, and we take turns attending collegiate meetings and events. We support the girls by answering questions and providing guidance when needed, but for the most part we help them learn to govern themselves and perform the duties of their sorority offices properly.
Each local sorority chapter is a branch of the national organization, and nearly every member holds an office that has its own duties and paperwork. That’s why offices held in a sorority are usually listed on early resumes; they are positions requiring responsible actions with repercussions when duties are not fulfilled. We help the girls keep it all straight, and yes – advisors are definitely available by phone, by email, or in person as needed. If something bad ever happens or if someone is very sick, we get a call.
Most National Greek Fraternity and Sororities are social organizations, with a strong emphasis on service. For example, Sigma Kappa conducts national fundraisers and donation drives for Alzheimer’s disease, Gerontology, the Maine Sea Coast Mission, and Inherit the Earth.
Locally the girls also participate in the Alzheimer’s Association Memory Walk, they donate their time to Christmas in April, they volunteer hours at an adopted local nursing home for monthly birthday parties and BINGO games, they help with various charity food drives, and they assist with other local philanthropy events as they come up. They are in demand because most of the local philanthropy’s and service groups know that they can be counted upon to help.
Some of the biggest benefits to joining a sorority – beyond making lifelong friends – is learning leadership skills, learning to give back to the community through regular philanthropic activity, and learning that you can make a difference when you are part of a group of like-minded members. It’s not for everyone, but I think that most people who join are grateful for the experience.
mcsouth
Judie: Thanks for the detail – certainly helps me put your initial article in better perspective. I would agree that this type of environment is certainly needed for the young folks that are often out on their own for the first time when they head off to college – I know that I certainly could have used some guidance every now and then to avoid some of the …….incidents…..that I was involved in!
http://www.geardiary.com Judie
Ha! I could write so much more about it.
And believe me, “incidents” still happen, these are 18 – 22 year olds after all…but at least they have a built-in support system for just about everything they might get into.